From the album ‘Come Again‘ (1977).
- Derek:
- I saw this bloke the other day.
- Clive:
- No, did you?
- Derek:
- Did I tell you?
- Clive:
- No! You d-…
- Derek:
- Yeah.
- Clive:
- No, you didn’t, I don’t fucking b-… don’t come that with me!
- Derek:
- No, really, I know…
- Clive:
- You saw this bloke the other day?
- Derek:
- Yeah.
- Clive:
- You don’t expect me to believe that, do you?
- Derek:
- I don’t, no, I don’t.
- Clive:
- Oh, that’s outrageous that is.
- Derek:
- What, I know.
- Clive:
- That’s outrageous.
- Derek:
- Yeah, but…
- Clive:
- You saw this bloke the other day! Ha ha!
- Derek:
- No, It’s true an’ all, it’s true.
- Clive:
- Oh, come off it, you cunt!
- Derek:
- Yeah, huh huh huh.
- Clive:
- "Saw this bloke the other day", you cunt!
- Derek:
- I saw him. I saw him.
- Clive:
- Course you didn’t, you never saw a bloke the other day.
- Derek:
- I saw him.
- Clive:
- How could you have done?
- Derek:
- I don’t know. That’s what…
- Clive:
- Well, all right…
- Derek:
- …that’s what I, that’s what, er, defied, er, er, description…
- Clive:
- All right.
- Derek:
- I saw him and I don’t know how! I don’t know how I saw him, but I saw him! I was going along the street and I saw this bloke.
- Clive:
- Yeah, no, come on, what proof have you fucking got that you saw this bloke.
- Derek:
- I got no proof. All right, no,…
- Clive:
- What, what, what proof, what proof have you got?
- Derek:
- I’ve got no proof, mate.
- Clive:
- What proof?
- Derek:
- Just…
- Clive:
- Well, without proof there’s no fucking point in talking, is there?
- Derek:
- Well, there is…
- Clive:
- I can prove that I’m here ’cause I’ve got a witness.
- Derek:
- Who?
- Clive:
- You!
- Derek:
- I… where are you?
- Clive:
- I’m here, cunt! Can’t you see me? Cuh… You talk about some bloke you saw the other day…
- Derek:
- Yeah.
- Clive:
- Yeah, O.K., you’ve seen a bloke, have you? So what’s so good about that?
- Derek:
- Nothing. Nothing, I…
- Clive:
- What’s so interesting about this particular story?
- Derek:
- There’s noth-, I just wanted to tell you, I saw this bloke.
- Clive:
- You saw a bloke, er, er, you saw a bloke, you saw a bloke, so, so what, so, you saw him. So what happened?
- Derek:
- Nothing happened.
- Clive:
- Any happier? You any happier? You feeling better for seeing this bloke? Course you aren’t!
- Derek:
- I didn’t say I’d feel better.
- Clive:
- WHY RAISE IT IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACE THEN?!
- Derek:
- I thought you might be interested.
- Clive:
- I wasn’t in the least interested! I was sitting here quietly wanking.
- Derek:
- How would I know?
- Clive:
- How would you know? By fucking intuition, mate! Can’t you have something intuitive?
- Derek:
- All right, I saw this, this, this woman.
- Clive:
- That’s better.
- Derek:
- Right.
- Clive:
- Now you’re talking.
Derek and Clive 